The move to NZ was tough for us all but for Bethany I cant even begin to imagine the confusion she has as to why everyone she loved dearly has now gone from her life. Its something that I have really struggled with emotionally.
At first I thought that it would have been better to do this move when she was a baby, then she wouldn't have this yearning or the sadness for her family. But I have come to realise that although she misses them very much, the memories she has of them are much more precious. Bethany knows who she is talking to on the phone, she knows what they look like and she talks about the things she used to do with them all the time. Looking forward to when she can do it again.
I have constantly been trying to over compensate for 'the loss' by making her new life here as happy as possible. Poor Bethany has a Christmas birthday and so only gets presents once a year, meaning that throughout the year we really should find a reason for new things that come into her life.
Bethany has a reward chart, it was initially designed due to a huge drop in her behaviour once we moved here, unfortunately it must have hit her harder than we thought. This chart has worked fantastically though, every time she is a good girl she is rewarded by moving up the chart, of course when she is 'naughty' she goes down. She fully understands how this works and for the last 6 months this has worked amazingly.
She is just showing off now with practically getting to number 5 every day, which means a little reward...I think the chart will need some remodelling soon!
I have learned so much from other mothers I have met here, I have seen things from all angles and I am now at peace with myself that we are giving our daughter the best. People have made comments that she is 'spoilt' but so what? She will have some of the happiest childhood memories we could ever imagine, and for that, its all completely worth it.
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